Writing and self-publishing a children’s book has been a very rewarding venture for me, but it has also come with lots of opportunities for growth. I have learned so much about the process by simply going through it myself. There are many complexities and things to consider, and so many decisions to make. 

One thing I didn’t get was the importance of a formal book review by a trusted source.

I read about the need for book reviews, but honestly, I didn’t fully understand. I was under the impression this was simply referring to regular people, or influencers writing reviews on Amazon or some other bookseller’s website. So, I decided that wasn’t a huge deal for me. Afterall, I wanted to publish a book to be able to share with kids and start conversations. I didn’t have aspirations of becoming a best-selling author (don’t get me wrong, that would be amazing, but not the goal).

This is the point I began to realize there was a roadblock.

I reached out to the head of librarians in our school system, (who I happen to know from my own high school days) and let her know I have published my first children’s book! Yay! Her response was such that I couldn’t get my book into the school libraries without a formal book review, and she listed a few trusted sources for my convenience. Well, that’s a bummer. A really big bummer since the free ones require submission up to 16 weeks PRIOR to publication – well, that was like 17 weeks ago at this point. This meant my remaining option was to use a paid source, or don’t get the review. I decided to just leave it be for the time being, still not understanding all of the implications of not having a review.

A couple of weeks later, I was ready to schedule an author visit at my kid’s school! Woohoo! Finally, this is what I have been waiting for. Well, to my great disappointment, the lack of review prevents me from being invited into the school to read Always Be a Friend or promote it in any way. The biggest bummer yet.

I don’t know if you know this, but authors don’t actually make very much money on the sale of a book. In fact, I still have quite a way to go to be able to cover all of the costs. I did know this going into the process. What that does mean, is that I didn’t really want to have to pay for a book review. However, I did it anyways because that is what I needed to do to be able to get an opportunity to read to students.

Monday, November 6, 2023 is the day I received the long-awaited book review. It wasn’t great. I felt such a flood of disappointment. It’s not that I think this is the greatest book ever or have some over-inflated sense of things, but it was a let-down. Initially, I thought, “I can’t publish this review, it isn’t going to help me sell books.” I also feared it would portray my illustrators in a negative light – which is unfair to them, because they produced the exact art I asked for. I needed this book review to get into the school, but now that I have it, I don’t think people will want to read the book because of it. There’s the irony.

After mulling this over for a couple of days, I realized that I felt so bummed because the point of the book was misunderstood. The structure of the lessons was implemented to cause pause and open space for conversations. Well, in that case, yeah, the narrative may indeed get bogged down in the structure. I also felt that the mention of the “potentially confusing fantasy sequences that aren’t mentioned in the text” was bothersome because the reviewer missed the whole point of using one’s imagination. Which is funny since I call out the fact that adults often don’t use their imaginations enough. I don’t disagree with the review, but it lacks is the understanding of my intentions and the context in which the book was written. Always Be a Friend is meant to start conversations and induce reflection. This is best accomplished when someone (me, a parent, teacher, or counselor) can interact and facilitate the conversations, pause and ask questions.

I have had a lot of good feedback regarding the book, especially from teachers. I have chosen to publish the Kirkus review with the hope I get a chance to give some additional context to Always Be a Friend and why I chose to write it the way that I did.

I will persevere.